Oh, hey y’all! It’s officially summer break here in East Tennessee. I’m not going to lie to you, I have incredibly conflicting emotions regarding this break. I had an amazing school year, perhaps the best one yet. That being said, it went by in a flash- even without having our usual two-week snow break. Oh, and with having to go on leave the previous two years for *reasons* this was the first time I’ve worked through the end of the school year in three years. Still, the speed of it all disarmed me.

On one hand, the hope of summer thrilled me. On the other, a tad of grief enveloped me. Tis the plight of a teacher at the end of a great year- you’ve prepared them for the future, and you are no part of that future. I understand Mr. Feeney better each day.

Last week, I had this whole post about Mother’s Day, and then I choked at hitting “publish.” Crazy as it seems, I found out I was going to be a mom nearly three years ago, but I still feel like my nose is pressed on the window, peering into this world I longed for. I already seriously suffer from imposter syndrome, but it’s even more evident in this facet of my life. Anyway, I guess I think if I tell you I plan on polishing that up where the truth really shines though, the more likely I am to maybe publish it this week.

Meanwhile, here are some links that have sparked my interest this week.

Black Dahlia Murder Case Let me preface this by saying I had no knowledge of this case before one of my students presented it as part of her Genius Hour project. She mentioned this article, and I.Was.Hooked. Everything you could possibly want to know is here, and it’s stranger than fiction. Now, I just feel like I need to move to California and completely devote my life to this cold case. Go ahead and google follow-ups while you’re at it.

“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Uses the Word ‘Rape’ and Why It’s a Big Deal” (WARNING: Link contains spoilers) Can I just say, I am in the middle of season 3, and I watch it so differently since reading this commentary? I almost feel like I need to rewatch the whole series, and why not? I mean, I’ve watched The Office no less than 30 times. Let’s not forget, show creator/ my hero Tina Fey was attacked as a child, giving her that “trademark” scar across her face.

“Hotdogs, Sunscreen, and All the Other Ways I’m Messing Up” This is perfunctorily me. Such a paradox- I think about this very concept all the time, while not thinking about it at all. I didn’t skip out on the rite-of-passage dollar store water guns, despite warnings that it may invoke violence or she may be exposed to BPA when she inevitably drinks from said water pistol, but I do buy organic milk and I definitely cut eyes when we pass the smoking section at the zoo. For the record, I was exposed to all of the above as a child, and I’m still kicking. Why are we so darn crazy nowadays?

“Ebb and Flow” This just hit so close to home for me. Honestly, anything that cites Proverbs 31 gut punches me in the feels. How I long to be that woman! How I long to want to want being that woman! This articulated oh so well the struggle, the internal dialogue I combat on the daily.

“Love Like Ghosts” Two of my dearest friends are going through such a tough time. I can’t express the profound sadness that surrounds them, how I pray for the arms of Jesus around them, and how I helpless I feel as a friend who can only offer so much support. I just hear this song and think of their hearts, right now, in this perplexing moment.

It seems a bit appropriate that rain will fall hard this weekend. It’s a weekend that says: “Don’t plan too much.” And so, we’re listening. We need rest more than anything, and I pray we can accomplish this easily.

These aren’t so much links that think, but just more things I enjoy right now. It’s been such a weird week! I had the stomach flu Sunday night/ all day Monday. Turns out, four teachers on my hall all had it at the exact time, so it was definitely something in the air. This was my second bug in 6 weeks though, so I am moderately convinced (like so many things) this could be curbed with some better dietary choices. I dunno. It sucked and I’d do anything to avoid it again.

When I haven’t been praying that my little family didn’t get hit with this, I’ve been trying to organize little facets of my life. Once I recovered, I made a “Get Your Ess Together” plan and I feel much better about life. I don’t know why, but even a day out for the count gives me total-loser feelings and makes me wonder what I’ve done with my life. Anyone else?

Also, I normally don’t watch a lot of tv, but I’ve been eye-deep all week. Season 3 of Catastrophe is now on Amazon. It wasn’t my favorite season, and I bout died when I felt like the plot was really taking off only to discover it was in fact the season finale. 6 episodes! Who does that?

Then, I discovered the show Life in Pieces on Netflix. I think it’s actually a CBS show. I’m too lazy to google it, and really…does it matter? It’s freaking hilarious. I’ve been seriously longing for humor lately, and it seems harder to come by. To top it off, I have a pretty specific sense of humor and am not easy to please. (Joke. Kind of.) I have found myself staying up way too late binging on it, even carrying my iPad around the house so I can laugh while I pack my lunch and stuff. I haven’t been that dedicated to a show, ever.

Anyway, I took my nephroos out tonight so I’m already pondering supergluing my eyelids open. Here’s what I’m digging/ thinking about this week.

8 Paradoxes of Creative People I have, as she calls it, a “messy mind.” Always have.This list was a window into my soul/ psyche and honestly validated me. The thing people least understand about me is that I need time to myself to work through problems and create/design solutions. I cannot do this in a room of people because the instant feedback bogs me down. It takes time for me to articulate ideas, but I am full of them!

8 Tips for Taking Better Instagram Photos I possess no photography skills, but I desperately want to take great pictures. I made this one of my 17 resolutions for the year. Initially, I wanted to invest in a DSR camera, but really the iPhone 7S takes amazing photos, so I’ve been experimenting a lot with it. Helllloooo portrait feature! I needed a new phone, so I went ahead and invested in it and I regret nothing. I am obsessed with the pictures it takes. I guess like so many professional lenses, it captures the beauty in the ordinary.

Growing Up Under The Watchful Eye of Social Media Full disclosure: I do post pictures of Novella on Instagram, and occasionally on this blog (see above). I am extremely conscientious about what I post, what I say, and most of all: why I am posting it. I am so proud of Novella, but I never mention how smart she is or anything that deliberately compares her to other children, or worst of all, straight up brags. Social media is already such a breeding ground for comparison, and I really don’t want to contribute to that. On the other side of that, I choose not to show her at her worst moments, either. Sick pictures are a no-no. Tantrum pictures are quite tempting, but I contain myself.

I would not have thought this way except (when I was pregnant with Novella) a group of my students wrote about how parents should not post pictures without their consent and gave plenty of anecdotes about instances that embarrassed them. Sick pictures and report cards were at the top of their lists, and so I took that to heart. (This is rare case, the only time I’ve ever actually been persuaded through grading essays.) I think “sharenting” is a cultural norm, but we are nonetheless obligated to respect our children’s individual rights and honor them as a human being. Personally, if B would’ve thought to snap a pic of me amidst the stomach flu, I won’t even publically say what I would do.

My Book is Officially Out in the World via The Everywherist Decided I’m going to go ahead and read this over the weekend. If the humor remotely parallels her blog, my cup o laughter might just runneth over.

We have zero plans for the weekend. We had an out of town trip planned, but B’s schedule just couldn’t accommodate it, so I am counting that as a blessing! It’s rainy and cold, so naturally, I’m going to box up my cold weather clothes. I’ll make something that’s hearty and healthy. Gonna read. It’s going to be a good one!

Tell me what you’ve been reading lately via links! I find myself reading the same 4-5 sites daily, and could use a few suggestions!